I am Fey, and I will be your hostess. I'm almost 40 (coming up in September). I'm a Libra (not that I pay much attention to astrology - what a craptastic pagan, eh?! ) My soul number is 9, and my path is, well...

Kind of all over the place.

I'm a mystic. By that I mean that I find the divine in everything. I purposefully seek it out. Especially in places it might not be easy to spot.

I'm a pantheist, which means, in an itty bitty nutshell, that I believe that nature is god. I would go into greater depth on that, but there are others who put this much more eloquently than I do, so I shall let them. (If you want to click and come back, feel free!)

I'm a pagan, by which I mean that I am of the earth. To me, this also means I live here, now, in my body, and that I enjoy my body (or being incarnate, if you prefer) and all the pleasures having a body and living on the earth in the here and now allow without shame or fear of retribution. As a pagan, I employ symbolism, ritual, and various spiritual practices to forge and maintain and connection with my understanding of the divine. Some of these 'spiritual' practices might look oddly pragmatic to the casual viewer. For example, breathing. And eating well. And working for a living.

I'm a student. I have studied most of the religions 'of the book' in some depth, and have read up on most of the many and varied 'brands' of paganism. I've had first hand experience with Reclaiming, a little Feri (a la Francesca De La Grandis and T. Thorn Coyle), shamanic journeying, feminist witchcraft, family traditional witchcraft, eclectic paganism, goddess spirituality, and am now a student of Blue Star Wicca. I've studied tarot, numerology, anthropology, a little psychology, a smidge of mythology...you get the picture, I'm sure.

I'm not an initiate in the British Traditional Witchcraft (BTW) sense of the word, though I am working towards this milestone. I resisted Wicca for a long, long time - mostly out of ignorance and prejudice that grew out of too many very negative encounters with those professing to be of the Wicca. I have laid those prejudices aside and found a wonderful teacher in Blue Star, but don't get too excited about that, because I won't be talking about my experiences in Blue Star *at all* in this podcast. Blue Star Wicca, like all other BTW branches of the Craft, is a mystery tradition, and as such, it is not for public consumption. The only way to learn anything much about Blue Star is to find a Blue Star coven and hope you're a good fit. Go here for more information on Blue Star. That will be all I'll have to offer on the subject of Wicca as I define it.

(In case you missed that, I define Wicca as initiatory. As in, you must be initiated by an initiate to claim Wicca as your own. For more on this, please go here.)

Paganism is an incredibly diverse collection of practices and beliefs, and I don't claim to know everything about all of them. I know a little about some of it and will be limiting my topics to those I can cover with some confidence. I claim no expertise in the subject. I don't hold a degree in religious studies.

What I do have to offer is based solely on my own experience. Please take what like and put it to good use, whether that means learning from what I offer, or being entertained by it.

You are welcome to put the rest on the compost heap on your way out the door. I really won't mind. :)

As for the more personal stuff, I've had an online presence in one form or another since 1999. I'm a parent (teenagers abound!) and I'm very much in love with the world's most wonderful agnostic. We all live in a dinky little house on a nice, quiet street not far from a cemetery, a grocery store, and a high school.

I knit, make soap, read avidly, and surf blogs. I write a little, but not nearly as much as I used to. I also work full-time, so fitting in all the 'want to dos' is difficult sometimes and tends to frustrate me. We (my partner and I) are working hard toward making our house livable after buying a fixer upper. (Oy.)

I am self-educated and interested in many things, ranging from religion to history to literature to anthropology to women's studies. I will likely get a degree one day. I hope so, at least, since I drool over other people's PhD's.

I am a survivor of child sexual abuse, spousal abuse, and the suicide of a sibling. I am estranged from most of my mother's side of the family, but I have a relationship with my dad, a few cousins, an uncle, and and couple of aunts. I'm pretty content with the tribe I've created for myself. I feel that the family we choose can be far more intimately ours than the family we're born into.

I don't really believe in life after death, which makes me an odd sort of pagan. I don't believe in faeries and spirits in the new age way of believing in them. I believe in the forces of nature, and I acknowledge that there are more things in heaven and earth than I could ever possibly understand. This makes me kind of awestruck and, frankly, humbled by the universe we live in. I don't feel the need to know everything about how paganism works. It just does, and that's good enough for me.

I don't feel the need to sneer at those who wholeheartedly believe things I don't. I figure personal gnosis is more important than proving to anyone that we are 'right' about our own hard won conclusions. I don't like the description 'fluffy' in reference to anyone's spiritual path, and you won't find me using it, at all, ever.

I'm fiercely for sexual freedom - as in, whatever your orientation, whatever your kink, whatever floats your boat, I believe you have gods given right to pursue it with *adults* of like proclivities. I'm also fiercely for equanimity between the sexes, a child's right to safety and love within the family home, and compassion as a proper expression of gratitude for being alive on planet earth.

I have no interest in astrology. I very rarely, if ever, 'cast spells'. I think that self-awareness and compassion are the highest order of spiritual endeavour. I don't have a need to throw 'white light' around or wink mysteriously at non-pagans about magic. I don't have a need to spell magic with a 'k', either.

I do have a need (as do we all) to connect with others of like mind, to be creative, and to be known and loved as I am. I have a need to serve my tribe in whatever capacity I am able. I hope this podcast serves those needs, and I hope it serves some of yours, as well.

Proceed to the Podcast